All I want for christmas is my....

"LOA, my LOA, my LOA...." Remember that little piece of paper that we have been waiting on? It was supposed to take 30-70 days and here we sit with day 100 approaching quickly.... not that I'm really counting, right? Once we get that paper, it is 2-3 months to travel... so my dreams of Jan. travel have officially died and my february dreams are hanging on for dear life. We finally found out this it is an issue with the place translating our dossier (aka mountain of paperwork) for the CCCWA (Chinese Gov't in charge of adoption). It is not just us but affecting lots of families with our agency, so at least I'm not alone.

Derek is totally laid back about it all and confident of God's timing... and likes to remind me that God knows the bigger picture. I know this of course.... my mind is confident in His timing... my heart just struggles to keep up.... i just don't want my baby to spend on more day in an orphanage! I ache to hold her, to know her, to learn all of her mannerisms, her smells, her noises.... So as I was complaining to derek once again (98 days gives you ample opportunity to gripe) he said something different that stuck with me... maybe she needs to be there for longer to be there for a little friend of hers?

Not that we can know what His reasoning is, but it kind of hit me smack in the face.... this is not all about me! (Not so pleasant to be reminded about your self-centeredness!) God is doing something amazing and it is not all about me getting my daughter.... It is HIS story to write... and who am I to question why He has allowed yet another delay?? He will add twists and turns to bring the most glory to Himself.... Mei Sims will be plucked from the orphanage at just the right time.... not a minute too soon and not a minute too late.... This wait is for sure excruciating but TRYING to remind myself of this truth daily. So for now, I've got to be patient, trust, rest and then repeat.